Best Tips To Getting Pregnant

Waiting for the right partner
 
Perhaps the most important factor of all in finding the right time to have a child is finding the right person to build a family with. In our twenties, our priorities may be more focused on our careers and social lives than on finding the right partner to settle down with, but as we get older, and more aware of our biological clock, the pressure to meet the right person can become intense. Most of us have grown up with the expectation that we will meet someone first and then start a family, and for women in their thirties who feel ready to have a child, the lack of a suitable partner can be the major stumbling block.

Best Tips To Getting Pregnant

In the past, women in this position might have felt their only option was to settle down with the first vaguely acceptable man who came along, but we may be less prepared to make that kind of compromise today. Women are used to being financially and emotionally independent and to taking responsibility for their own lives, and may not be willing to accept the idea of a less than ideal relationship just because it will give them the opportunity to have a child. Using donor sperm, it is possible for a woman to have a child without having a man, and this is a way ahead that more women are actively considering.
 
'I had the option to go out and find myself a bloke but that's easier said than done, and also very wrong to get into a relationship because you want children and then split up a few years later, or get drunk and have a one-night stand. I didn't want my six-year old to say, "Who is my daddy?" and to shrug my shoulders and say,"l don't know - some bloke ..." The option of being childless is very sad, and I live in an age where I have the choice and the technology to prevent that.' Mary, 41

Lesbian couples and motherhood 

Whereas once their sexuality might have stood in the way of motherhood, it no longer poses the same kind of problem for lesbian couples, who can use donated sperm to start a family. The lifestyle factors involved in finding the right time to have children, feeling settled in a relationship, being financially secure and the restraints of the biological clock are exactly the same, but a lesbian couple must also make a decision as to which of them will carry the baby. This may be based on age and work circumstances, as well as considering which of them is most keen to experience pregnancy and birth.
 
'I always assumed that I would have children. I came out as a lesbian when I was 18 or 19. That was just about the time when there was a lot of publicity about lesbian mothers. I never thought there would be a contradiction between the two things' Naomi. 39
 
Finding what's right for you 

For all women, single or with a partner, gay or straight, finding the right time to have a child involves taking into account a whole series of considerations based around our situation, circumstance and expectations. Having children is no longer an automatic step, and although having more choices may have made our lives richer, it has also made the decision-making process more complicated.

The time may never feel absolutely ideal, but an awareness of our biological clock can help crystallize our thoughts. Despite all the advances in reproductive technology, we have to accept that we may not be able to leave it as late as we would like, and our age may be the crucial decision-making factor for many of us. Finding the right relationship is often key too, although it is no longer unusual for women to sidestep this, particularly if they feel time is running out. Feeling secure and settled, being at the right point in your career, having the right home or the right salary may all influence your decision, but we have to remember that each of us will have her own interpretation of her circumstances, and must make her own decision about when the time is right. To find out more, you can check out Best Tips To Getting Pregnant. 

 

How To Help Your Chances Of Getting Pregnant

Your age
 
Age is often the key factor in making the decision to start trying to have a family. We know that we get less fertile as we get older and that we risk not being able to have children if we leave it too long, but at the same time most of us want to have enjoyed some child-free time before we submerge ourselves in the responsibilities of family life.
 
If you know you want children, and particularly if you feel you'd like more than one, your age is not something you can choose to ignore. Although many women do get pregnant in their late thirties and early forties, by this age we are well past our peak fertility. It would be wonderful if there were no time restraints on female fertility and if concerns about being able to cope with small children were the only potential worry of starting a family in our forties. If you know you want a child eventually, your awareness of the ticking of your biological clock may be more important than anything else in pushing you towards motherhood. Many women do find that at a certain point they suddenly feel ready to have children, but this may happen to one woman in her twenties, and another in her late thirties and is likely to be affected by your circumstances.
 

How To Help Your Chances Of Getting Pregnant

'I started to think about my biological clock when I was 29. I'd been with my partner then for nearly nine years and I was very aware that I was getting near to 30, and that while my husband-to-be could take all the time in the world to make his choices, I couldn't.' Siobhan, 41
 
Your job
 
Fitting a family around your career can be difficult. We no longer believe that we need to choose between a career and a family, but we may have concerns about being sidelined at work, or having to reduce our options once we have children. Finding the right time to have a baby often involves some kind of compromise on the work front.

Women who get pregnant in their early twenties may build successful careers once their children start school, whereas those who wait until they are heading towards the top of their career paths may find it easier to take a break as they are already well established. Most women think about starting families somewhere in between these two points, and it is not always the easiest time from a work perspective.

Some jobs, and some employers, are far more family-friendly than others and offer good maternity benefits, plenty of time off and even the opportunity of returning to work part-time or working flexibly. The downside of arrangements like these is that they may involve stepping sideways, or even backwards, on the career ladder, but that can seem a price worth paying if you are trying to juggle work and childcare. Some women manage to fit children around their careers very successfully, and having a family may be just one of many priorities, but, for others, becoming a mother is always going to be the most important role.
 
Your relationship
 
The decision to start trying to have a baby can be particularly difficult if your partner is less keen to make a commitment. Men are largely free from time constraints on their fertility, and although research suggests that there may be some age-related decline in male fertility, they are unlikely to feel the same pressure to have a child sooner rather than later. A woman in her late thirties will be aware that she is cutting it fine if she wants a family, particularly if she intends to have more than one child, whereas her male counterpart may feel safe in the knowledge that waiting another five years is unlikely to make a great deal of difference to his chances of becoming a father.

It can be tough if you feel ready, or if you are worried that time is running out, and your partner wants to wait. Women in this situation often feel they are being forced to make a choice between having a child and staying with their partner. This dilemma does put an end to some otherwise happy relationships, or alternatively can leave women resenting the fact that they feel they are wasting their remaining fertile years waiting for a partner who isn't ready to commit.

It is not always the female partner who is rooting to start a family. Women have to carry babies, give birth and breastfeed, and sometimes it is the woman who is reluctant to try to get pregnant, as she may be keenly aware that the advent of children means her life will change far more than her partner's. Women still bear the brunt of childcare responsibilities in most relationships, and may be worried about the sacrifices they know they will have to make.

Most couples do eventually come to some kind of agreement when one of them is keener to start a family than the other, but it is important to make sure that you are both happy with your decision, as having children, or choosing not to have them, will affect the rest of your lives.

'I never wanted kids from a young age. I didn't have that maternal instinct, My husband is more traditional. I would have left it later if he hadn't wanted kids, but I'm glad he pushed me into it when we got married. I could potentially have resented losing my freedom if I'd had kids earlier, but now l am ready.' Mikaelo, 32. To find out more, you can check out How To Help Your Chances Of Getting Pregnant.

Easy Way To Get Pregnant Naturally

Leaving it to chance
 
Although most of us have had the need for effective contraceptive use drummed into us from our teenage years, research suggests that as many as one in three pregnancies are unplanned. Although some of these pregnancies may be the result of contraceptive failure, far more are due to risk-taking. Women who had been feeling slightly ambivalent about motherhood may discover that getting pregnant unintentionally takes the element of choice away. Although some may opt to terminate the pregnancy, many decide that they want to keep the baby, particularly if they had been hoping to have children in the not too distant future.

It can be hard to make the decision to start a family, and you may never feel that the time is absolutely right. Couples who are dithering about making the commitment sometimes leave it to chance by being less careful about contraception. Although they may not be actively trying to have a baby, they may not be trying particularly hard not to have one either.
 

Easy Way To Get Pregnant Naturally

Making a commitment
 
Women's lives today are not always child-friendly. Our jobs often involve working long hours or lots of travel.
Enjoying a social life, going out with different partners, seeing the world and having some life experiences can all feel more immediately important than starting a family. We may want to achieve some of our other goals in life before we are ready to think about having babies, and this means that more and more of us are well into our thirties before we seriously consider motherhood.
 
For young professional couples who may have spent many years enjoying their freedom and their lifestyles, starting a family can appear to be a huge life-changing step. Once you start analyzing the pros and cons, you may never feel you are at precisely the right point in your life.

Financial security is very important to some couples, who need to feel that they are settled and have enough money before making a commitment. Others may want to wait until they have a home with enough space for a child, or until they've got that promotion or pay rise they've been anticipating. The reality is that we could always be more financially secure and settled, have a larger home or have got one step further in our careers, and there is always an excuse when we are not entirely sure. For a generation accustomed to having so much choice, it is not an easy decision.
 
'I think it's quite a scary thing to do. In a way, you never feel ready, and we both had periods of thinking we'll make the decision and start trying and then complete panic that we had made that decision. I think it is hard, particularly for our generation, because we are used to being quite selfish really and we do see it as giving up stuff. I think for our parents it was just more automatic" Rochel, 31
 
What influences the decision? 

For each individual, there may be a number of different factors that finally convince us we are ready for children. They may come from within and be related to our particular circumstances, or there may be external influences which lead us to the conclusion that the time is right to start trying for a baby.

Catalysts
 
Sometimes it is an outside event that alters your perspective, and can suddenly make you think that you are ready to make the decision to have children. It can be a relatively obvious matter of a friend or relative getting pregnant or having a baby that makes the idea more appealing, but the catalyst can come from anywhere and can be set off by any event that makes you take stock of your life and think seriously about your future.

 
'I'd never wanted children. It just wasn't important. I was very much into my career, getting on in life. I had other things to do. Then my granddad died, and I started wondering whether it was something to think about.' Corinne, 36. To find out more, you can check out Easy Way To Get Pregnant Naturally.

 

Ways To Become Pregnant Easier

For some women, finding the right time to have a baby is about finding the right circumstances. You may have reached an age where you feel you can't leave it any longer, you may have found the partner you plan to be with for the rest of your life, you may have got to a point in your career where you've achieved what you wanted or you may just feel financially secure and settled.
 
For others, trying to find the right mindset is more of a barrier to having children than the circumstances.
Making a conscious decision to start a family can seem a monumental step, particularly as we feel we have more choice in the matter than previous generations, and are aware of the lifestyle changes it will involve.
 

Ways To Become Pregnant Easier

Feelings about motherhood 
 
Our ideas about how we see our lives progressing, and whether being a mother is important to us, are often shaped at an early age. Women may have very strong and certain feelings about this, or may be unsure where and how motherhood will fit into the lives they want to lead.
 
Knowing what you want
 
Motherhood is an essential part of how some women see their future, and it may be something you have always known you want in your life. You may not be wondering whether you are going to have children, but simply when you are going to get around to it. Women who feel this way may still want to wait for the right circumstances, but having a family is not something they are prepared to compromise on, and they will put themselves through whatever it takes in order to try to achieve this goal.
 
Motherhood doesn't hold the same attractions for everyone, and there are many women who are equally adamant that they don't ever want to have children. They may be put off by the responsibilities of having a family, and prefer instead to keep their careers, lifestyles and finances intact, or they may relish the freedom of being child-free. Making the decision not to have children is not always easy in a society that can seem to revere the family. Women who choose to be child-free may find that people assume they must be career-orientated hard-nosed types who don't have time for children in their lives, and they may feel pressured by others who cannot understand their decision.
 
'I think there's a lot of peer pressure. There's this expectation that it is just something that happens when you've been with someone for a long time and it is an established relationship. I never ask people why they do have children, but they always feel they have to ask me why I don't.' Sara, 44
 
The traditional pattern
 
Not all women have such definite views one way or the other when it comes to procreation, and the decision to have a child does not always involve any particularly deep thinking or longing. For our grandmothers, and indeed many of our mothers, having a baby was not something to be pondered and discussed. Starting a family was just what was expected once you were married.
 
Today, many couples dispense with marriage, but settling down with the right partner is usually followed at some point by discussions at least about starting a family. With so many more choices, having babies is no longer an inevitability, but the majority of couples may still expect it to happen sooner or later once they are in a stable relationship.
 

'I didn't even think about children until I got married, and then I assumed that at some point we would want a family. I never thought about how much I wanted it, I just assumed it was a natural progression and that I ought to want it.' Julie, 40. To find out more, you can check out Ways To Become Pregnant Easier.
 

Best Way To Not Get Pregnant

The intrauterine device (IUD) is a T-shaped plastic device that is fitted inside the womb. It contains copper, which immobilizes sperm, and the IUD also makes it harder for eggs to meet sperm or for fertilized eggs to implant. Once the IUD is removed, your normal fertility usually returns immediately, but IUDs are associated with an increased risk of infection, which can cause infertility, and on very rare occasions they can damage the womb itself. Although the IUD is a highly effective contraceptive, it cannot prevent an egg implanting in the fallopian tubes, and so for the tiny percentage of women who do get pregnant while using one there is an increased risk of ectopic pregnancy, which can in turn lead to tubal damage and infertility. 

Best Way To Not Get Pregnant

The intrauterine system (IUS) is another T-shaped device that has to be fitted inside the womb, but it works differently from an IUD and is sometimes referred to as a hormonal IUD. The IUS releases synthetic progesterone, which thins the lining of the womb, thickens the cervical mucus and can sometimes prevent ovulation too. The synthetic hormone in the IUS can lead to a delay in reestablishing a regular menstrual cycle but normal fertility should return fairly quickly.
 
The morning-after pill is an emergency contraceptive that should be taken within 72 hours of unprotected intercourse, although it is most effective within the first 24 hours. It is similar to normal combined or progesterone-only pills, but has higher doses of synthetic hormones, and it works by stopping or delaying ovulation or implantation. It can disrupt your next period, but doesn't have any other effect on your future fertility.
 
Sterilization should only be contemplated if you are absolutely certain you will never want it reversed. It involves cutting the fallopian tubes and tying them up or sealing them, or blocking them by clipping them with rings or dips. Reversing sterilization is a difficult and expensive process, which is not always successful. It usually entails chopping out the section of tube that has been damaged, and joining the ends back together. If the ends of the tubes have been tied or sealed, it can be even harder to reverse the operation. Anyone who gets pregnant after they have had a sterilization reversal has a higher chance of an ectopic pregnancy.
 
For women who have a partner who has had a vasectomy, which involves cutting the tubes that carry sperm from the testes into the penis, the prospects are not much better. Vasectomy reversals don't always work and this is a delicate surgical procedure with huge variations in success rates. In general, no more than half of vasectomy reversals are successful, but this seems to depend on how long it is since the original vasectomy was carried out. If it is less than three years, there is a higher chance of success. In some cases, there are sperm in the semen after a vasectomy reversal but the sperm motility is poor, and they are not capable of getting a woman pregnant.
 
Natural family planning means you avoid having intercourse on your most fertile days, and you can buy natural family-planning kits if you want to use this method. They may monitor saliva, use urine tests or computerized thermometers, combining your body temperature, which rises when you ovulate, with other information about the length of your cycle. When you are trying not to get pregnant, the advice is that there are about ten days of the month on which you should avoid having intercourse. This errs on the side of caution as women who are trying to get pregnant are usually told there are eight days at the most on which they can conceive.

You can, of course, save money and do your natural family planning by charting your own cycles, but it usually takes a few months to recognize all the signs your body gives out when you ovulate, and it is only really easy to do this if you have pretty regular cycles. The advantage of using natural family planning if you're going to want to get pregnant later is that you will already have worked out precisely when you are at your most fertile during each cycle. It could be said that this is one form of contraception that may have a positive effect on your chances of getting pregnant in the future. The disadvantages of this method are that it involves diligence and commitment, and can be unreliable. To find out more, you can check out Best Way To Not Get Pregnant.